It’s easier to live under the blanket

I challenge myself in dreams
– never in danger, always on the alert –
I cannot die and even get touched
but
I run, I run, I fight, I’m chased
constantly, they’re closer, so near
I can feel my fear
without losing grace
I just focus and rise!

But I bounce here and there
my focus unfocused by fear
again, they are so near…

Now I’m awake
enough for tonight, challenge denied.

Joyful nonsense in a looming world

Hits me like the pain
after a rocambolesque fall
unexpected as the sweet delight
of bleeding the feeling out of the skin.
In a reversed way:
pain can be joy,
joy doesn’t change – itself  –
route

And
by the way
who has decided there’s a
need of cause
for the consequence of laugh?
Why should there be a reason for
a heart to scream
its lightness of being?


 

This poem connects to “The lightness of being me“, by me.

My funny torment

Me eating an apple, Still life in motion. Me watching you, Sturm und drang of the 21st century. Feeling like burning inside while acting a perfect cold manner. I don’t wear anything but a too large T-shirt, you don’t wear anything but me, and it fits you perfectly. The music is surrounding, drives your hands on my hips, my feet can’t touch the ground anymore. It makes me feel masochistic, you having me, you knowing it. My hair surround your fist that gently throws my back back, my spine arched in a smile, pushed me far yet closer to you. I can just feel the breeze of yours, breathe blowing on my shoulder, emotional drops flowing. I am a stretched sheet close to tear, two massive forces I could just put together, to which surrendering, intact.

Bar poetry – extract

The arrogant and the villain*
– sometimes, often all in one –
I am just a means
for his pray

You don’t have Coke?
you little nothing
what should I do then
with this lack of choice?

Improve your taste,
I would say.


 

*In this case I use “villain” to recall the Italian word “villano”, which corresponds to “boor”. Despite the different meaning I’ve decided to keep it this way, since the correct translation applies to the context, too.

 

Bar poetry is a collection born from my personal experience while I was working at night in a very old-fashioned underground music bar in Vienna. Each poem describes a different situation with the customers, often with a dialogue (spoken and unspoken) between them and me.

Untitled (about beauties and beasts and my naivety)

There are people with beautiful feelings
seeing people with beautiful feelings shining
like beautiful people hiding
beautiful feelings.

And there are people with less beautiful feelings
seeing people with less beautiful feelings shining
like beautiful people hiding
less beautiful feelings.

There are people with horrible feelings
seeing people with horrible feelings shining
like beautiful people hiding
nothing like beautiful feelings.

Spider web

I censor my eyes
’cause you can already see
– when able to –
deep inside of me

A line on eyes
to imitate the best
make-up ever:
the one that makes you
another

Colored if you are pale
pale, if you are colored
(I don’t use make-up anyways
because I always lay between
the lines)

Everyone is shouting
“Me! Me! Look at me!
Look away,
then back at me again:
am I not the coolest
you have ever met?”
My life scares me,
I borrow yours;
my mum fires me,
I find a new specialization: from trouble
to lost.

There is something in the eyes
-trying to scratch: still blind-
leaves me hypnotised all time
grows the distance, grows
the time I look better
behind the line.

A song I composed for Alice

I don´t know-
I was caught in a dream!
A dream with red hair and blue eyes,
which left me shell-less, all the time.
A dream that
all the dreams come true!
Yet the rhythm, I don´t know, the rythm is
blue.

A song I composed for Alice,
to tell her “I love you,
I have no fear”.
Notwithstanding I am
pretending.

A song I composed for Alice

 

…or was it me the
last addressee?

How to avoid disappearing

I sit and listen to music.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Nothing
else.
I am wasting my time

because I technically do
nothing.

Tick tock tick tock
Time is running and you are not producing
Tick tock tick tock
Time is passing and you are still unmoved
Wear your coat, get a job,
stop being absurd
about live for love.

I am totally with you,
I need my dream to come true.
Reality is tough, though,
Even worse than silence
in ropes, even
if I change,
I can’t change.
Even if I change,
why do I?
To conformize?
Why do I?

  • Modify my shape
  • Shape my body
  • Get healthier, more active
  • Stop compromising

 

I sit and listen to music.


 

This time it’s an homage to Lana Del Rey and her beautiful “How to disappear” (here in the first live version).